139 O Lord, you have searched me and known me!
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is high; I cannot attain it.
“Lord, you have searched me, you know me” (Psalm 139:1)
Lord, you have looked into my heart and you know me intimately. Everything about me is an open book to you, a book you have read and memorized, a favorite that you return to again and again. You have shined light, the light of your love, into the darkest corners of my life, and so you know how I think, why I act the way I do, even why my feelings occasionally erupt the way they do. You know my thoughts, even when they are far from you. You know and you understand. You forgive. You comfort and you encourage.
You know all the roads I have traveled: the dark alleys and the broad, easy streets; the byways where trouble stalks me; and the rocky ascents that I scramble up, weary and disheartened. You scrutinize my ways, watching over me carefully, surveying the ground before and behind me. Thank you for the times when you reach into my path and guide me – especially the times when I am headed directly away from you! You know it all, even the words on my tongue and the thoughts in my heart before I know them. And still you love me.
Yes, thank you God! That you do know me so intimately and continue to love me, it makes me want to serve you. It comforts and reassures me, inspiring me to love you more, to love you better. Knowing that you love and forgive me so fully frees me up to pursue you. It makes me want to listen for your voice more closely and respond more faithfully. Even if I misunderstand you or get it wrong, you love me still. You will never abandon me. No, all the days of my life, you will teach and lead, search and love me!
It is so much, good Father! Your patience with me, your kindness even when I cause pain – you never lose your temper with me! Your love is constant and comforting, and it’s wonderful, so far superior to my love for you.
Tell me today, Father, what you think of me. How do you see me? What do you know of me that I don’t even know about myself. I want to know your thoughts. I want to receive more of your love. I want to know you better! Amen.